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Window To Home

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Halloween:  Just the Beginning

Love it? or hate it?  Holidays bring out many emotions.  I happen to thrive during the holidays, looking forward to large family gatherings of children and grandchildren. Chaos, noise, and mounds of dishes never seem to bother me though my back often creaks by the end of the visit.  

The season starts at Halloween when witches and styrofoam pumpkins pulled from their hiding places. We look forward to having trick or treaters come to the door though each year the number has been decreasing.  No problem with leftovers though, since the two men in my home are happy to delve into chocolate sweets. 

Following is Thanksgiving when I am reminded of my own childhood in Philadelphia that would start at  Thanksgiving Day Parade. As kids we would push through the five-deep crowd to sit on the curb. One year my three year old brother got lost.  We eventually found him eating ice-cream at a police station along with dozen’s of screaming kids.  Once home we had a huge dinner in  celebration of my parent’s anniversary and Dad’s birthday, giving thanks to all. 

During the summer I start looking for the perfect holiday gift for each relative, and in a rush to make mail dates, I happily wrap them in my basement in early  December, surrounded by ribbons and bows while listening to jazz. I find it fun.

Ray dreads the holidays. The confusion and noise of my extended relations makes him want to retreat to a man cave. He enjoys visits from one family at a time and cringes when all 22 people descend on our home. The cat also hides. Thank goodness Ray is tolerant. 

Holidays are not only joyful. At times I feel a sadness.  I want to be the one to dress up as a witch and go to a party, but instead I watch others.   Our holiday decorations are getting a bit ratty looking but I am reluctant to buy more since they are expensive and I don’t know how many holidays I have yet to experience.  Bah humbug!!  I bought a new spook for the front porch anyway.  Look to the future, not the past.

As the winter solstice approaches and the nights become long, people throughout the ages have found reasons to celebrate.  Religious as well as secular practices remind people that life has cycles, the seasons change, the sun will return, there is hope for mankind and there are many fine reasons to celebrate.  Festivities have always drawn people together, reinforcing a sense of community and shared values. It is also a time for remembrance of those who are sick, poor and lonely, those who need special attention. Giving swells hearts and people feel good thinking of others. It is why we see an increase in charitable donations, gift buying for the needy and invitations given to guests who are alone.

There isn’t really one way of approaching the holidays, but to embrace the season’s spirit it helps to take the feelings and needs of others into account. I also try to get family members who did not grow up with my particular childhood rituals to become involved in a variety of ways that are not commercial.

One year each person in my extended family pulled a name out of a hat and was assigned the task of creating something special to honor that individual. One parent assembled photographs and published a book about her son, another wrote a short story.  One child painted pottery, another made a potholder, both presenting them as a special handmade gifts. My granddaughter wrote and sang a song while her younger sister played the harp.  The youngest child made a picture for his Dad that looked something like a two legged dinosaur.  Each person thought about their loved one and was creative in their presentation. We all sat around ooing and ahing as the gifts were unveiled.

With a bit of early planning it is easy to get our entire family to feel part of the festivities.  By involving the children in activities the noise settles down, the computer turns off, and a warm consciousness of family caring can burst forth.  These moments become the new memories that are built on a holiday spirit that everyone can embrace.

How do you celebrate the holiday season.  Please share your special remembrances below.

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